Love Lonely Page 8

  “I’ll be with you in a minute,” she acknowledged the visitor in a raised voice.

  “Breaker, it’s me,” she heard a reply.

  It was Fayd. She was only referred to as Breaker by those few who spent that year together. A nickname her counterparts coined after they sustained a fracture or two partnering with her in sparing sessions.

  Knowing it was Fayd, she only threw on the shirt not attempting to button it up. After all they’d seen each other naked many times during some of their brutal exercises. One such operation saw them paired off together then parachuted into the Malaysia jungle naked. They were expected to survive for two weeks with no supplies. Once on the ground the parachutes were soon modified into makeshift clothing. The only other item in their possession was a watch. It doubled as a GPS device monitored by their instructors. It could be activated as a distress indicator for an emergency. That did not occur once throughout the year. This group of soldiers would go to their grave before asking for assistance.

  It had been a long time since they’d been in each other’s company. She opened the door. Both took a second to stare into each other’s eyes. A warm smile came over their faces. Hearts fluttered faster than they ought to. Only those who endured what they did together would understand the bond between them. Their spouses would never see that side of them. Actually, odds were, they would never see the other nine who completed the year. Even if they did, all the painful, gruesome details would not be spoken about. So it was something shared by only the two of them.

  “Breaker, I missed you.”

  She backed up while he closed the door behind him. They embraced longer than normal.

  “Yes, it’s been far too long, Fayd,” she said. “You look good. Life must be treating you well,” complimenting him.

  “I may look good, but you, my dear,” he hesitated, looking at her from head to toe, spreading his hands apart. “How do you Americans say it, you look awesome.”

  They gave each other another hug.

  “My father said you arrived late last night. I apologize that I was unable to greet you at the airport but I just flew in late myself.”

  “Not a problem. Your father’s people were more than gracious.”

  “Being here has me reflecting on our past.”

  “It changed us forever didn’t it? Our fathers were correct in that there would be no return to a normal lifestyle.”

  “Fayd,” Sandy said moving on to the present. “You’re getting married. I’m so excited for you.”

  “Thank you for coming,” he replied. “It means a great deal to me that you have taken time out from your busy schedule to be here.”

  “Nothing, and I mean nothing, was going to keep me from attending my best friend’s wedding.”

  They sat on the bed, talked about his wife to be. He had a lot of questions with regards to how much of their past she discussed with David. Seeking her advice as he felt at a crossroads of wanting to fully commit to the future Princess, but knowing the reality was he could never reveal certain aspects of his past or present commissions.

  Sandy assured him it would work out. Yes, certain responsibilities would need to remain unspoken. She’d been able to succeed in her marriage. Fayd would no doubt find a true partnership with the future Princess.

  They had come a long way. Look at them now. When they parted ways at the end of that ferocious year, both suspected that neither of them would ever marry. That was just about the time the CIA took an interest in Sandy.

  Chapter 7

  David and Renée sat across from each other at a small table for two, located at the café’s front outside patio. Both ordered their drink of choice—beer. They were enjoying each other’s company outside of the customary confines of the workplace. A glowing candle sitting in the center of the table flickered off their faces. It was a warm night with a slight breeze. Most people sitting on the patio were couples. The day, nightfall, that instant, had a romantic aura to it. Not by design, but most certainly present. This was supposed to be an employer having dinner with an employee, nothing more. Yet they both could not help but be taken in by the alluring ambiance the evening was providing.

  The main discussion centered on tomorrow’s training session in preparation of the race. They were in agreement with the methods Renée would use to ready the horse. What they were not particularly on the same wave length was how the jockey should be instructed to position the horse during the race. Renée had spent an immeasurable amount of time with this thoroughbred, so David would surrender to her plan of action. After all, both he and Serge agreed she was ready. In all fairness she understood the horse better than anyone else. So this weekend’s race was Renée’s to run as she saw fit.

  “David do you think it would upset Sandy if she had knowledge of us having dinner tonight?”

  “I don’t see why it would concern her,” he replied. “Sandy spends most of her time on the other side of the world having dinner with a variety of people. Its work, isn’t it?”

  There was a growing mutual unspoken sentiment that there was more to this relationship. Neither was clear on whether the line would ever be crossed, but there definitely was another flame burning here other than the one in the middle of the table.

  “Absolutely, just work,” she was quick to answer, overemphasizing it. Yet it brought a grin to her face.

  He noticed the uneasiness of the reply and thought he caught a glimpse of what might have been construed as a wink directed his way.

  The food was served. The next hour was spent eating, talking about the business at hand, with a bit of flirtation thrown into the mix by both of them. Then supper was complete, the waiter cleared the table.

  “Well,” David said, “this has been a pleasant day. You make for good company young lady. I haven’t enjoyed myself like this for a long time.”

  “Careful there cowboy, we should be getting back to the hotel before we redefine the meaning of a working relationship.”

  She immediately regretted her words. The wine was beginning to speak for her.

  “You make a good point. A good night’s sleep is in order. We have a big day tomorrow.”

  With that David caught the waiter’s attention to settle up.

  Renée felt slightly aroused. Spending so many hours with David at the stables, the attraction was always present. Having him this close during the flight and dinner had elevated a desire for him. Toss in the playful conversation of the past few hours it was no wonder she was a little captivated. She was relieved they decided to head back to the hotel. She didn’t want her boss to take notice.

  David wasn’t exempt from the sensation brought on by the evening. His thoughts were similar. The present setting provided an ambiance nourishing the path that neither was sure they should take. With a little persuasion, a pleasant outing could have easily reverted into a complicated state of affairs.

  They made it back to the hotel without incident. The exchange during their walk was without flirtation. Neither of them was prepared to initiate the crossing of the fine line they were walking. And neither was prepared to expose to the other their present level of desire.

  The elevator door opened. They walked down the hall. Renée’s room came first. Stopping at her door, it was taking all the restraint both of them could mustard up to refrain from throwing the door open and tearing off each other’s clothes.

  “Hey, it’s been a great day Renée,” David told her, while intently staring into her eyes.

  “Thank you. It has been a refreshing break from our regular routine.”

  “That it has,” he replied, “and we still have the remainder of the weekend in front of us. I’m looking forward to sharing a couple more dinners.”

  “I’d like that.”

  “Good, but now we should get some sleep. How about we meet up for breakfast then catch a ride over to the track together.”

  “Oui, cela semble bon,” she responded in French expressing her approval.

  “Ok, I w
ill call you in the morning, goodnight.”

  He wasn’t sure if he should shake her hand, give her a quick kiss on the forehead or hug. Any contact at all seemed inappropriate. They awkwardly smiled at each other and he walked down the hall to his room.

  Renée entered her room, locked the door then fell on her bed stomach first. She started kicking the bed and punching the pillows with both arms and feet. Mumbling to herself, “You idiot, that’s your married boss. You idiot, you idiot, you idiot, God, I made such a fool of myself, you idiot!”

  After her little tantrum she striped her clothes off, went to the washroom to splash cold water on her face trying to come back down to earth. A shower would have to wait until morning as she returned to the bed disappearing under the covers.

  Replaying the day over and over, it wasn’t long before her eyes closed and she was drifting off. Then the phone rang.

  She realized it was her cell that was chiming. Her heartbeat instantly did double time. Presuming it was David calling with a change of heart wanting to take the relationship to the next level. Oh my god, what am I going to say to him. Fuzzy from near sleep it took a second to gather her composure. She decided right there and then she wasn’t going to resist the temptation any longer. If he wanted to come back to her room or her to his, she would agree.

  “Hello,” she answered not checking the call display as she was so certain it was him. At the moment there was only one other person on the face of the earth, David.

  “Renée,” she heard a woman’s voice on the other end.

  There was a moment of silence. It took an instant for Renée to pull herself together.

  “Gabriela?”

  “Is this a bad time? Do you have company?”

  “No, Gabriela, I’m alone,” she answered while straightening up into a sitting position on the bed. Resting her back on the head board and pulling a sheet up over her naked body.

  “Are you in town?” Renée questioned her not knowing when she was expected to fly in.

  “Actually I flew in this morning and spent the afternoon at the track. I thought I might run into you there but your groomers told me they weren’t expecting you until tomorrow.”

  “Oui, we arrived a few hours ago and thought it was best just to get an early start in the morning,” Renée explained.

  “We?” she heard Gabriela say.

  “David and I,” informing the inquisitive mind on the other end of the line.

  “Sandy is back in Europe so David offered me her seat. We felt it was too late to accomplish much at the track, so we opted to go out and have dinner.”

  “Renée is he there with you now,” whispered Gabriela. “You seem preoccupied.”

  Renée sighed, “No Gabriela, he’s not here. We had dinner, a nice conversation and then it was back to our separate little rooms. Just like two respectable co-workers, one of which is happily married, are expected to behave.”

  “I’m sensing from the tone of your voice that the end result of the evening may not have been what you had envisioned.”

  “On the contrary, it’s exactly what I expected,” she said.

  “I said envisioned, not expected.”

  Renée let it slide then changed the subject, “What hotel are you staying at?”

  “I’m at the Beverly Hill’s Four Season’s.”

  Coincidentally they were lodging at the same place.

  “What floor are you on?”

  “I’m in room 808. Why, are you thinking of coming over,” Gabriela teased.

  “No, but if you’re in the mood you could take the elevator to the tenth. Knock on suite 10C and then we can continue this discussion in person,” inviting Gabriela to her room.

  “What are the odds?” Gabriela was pleasantly surprised by the turn of events.

  Forty-five minutes later they were entangled in each other well on their way to closing out the day with a rapturous climax.

  ***

  Meanwhile, David had taken a shower. He poured himself a drink, retrieved a Martin Cruz Smith novel from his luggage and planted himself in one of the luxurious chairs. The plan was to read for an hour or so, and then it was down for a good night’s sleep. It was a book he had been trying to get to for months.

  The challenge was clearing his thoughts of Renée from his head. He had genuinely enjoyed her company. Yes, she was attractive. Yes, the thought of sleeping with her had crossed his mind. He liked being around her. It felt good.

  Momentarily he was lost in the novel before his preoccupation won over. Struggling to clear his mind knowing full well he shouldn’t feel this way. He had the most beautiful wife, who loved him dearly. She was unrivaled in the bedroom. By far the best partner, lover, and friend anyone could ask for. It would be ludicrous to jeopardize the relationship. That being said it wasn’t until today, spending time with Renée that he realized how lonely he actually was. Sandy’s frequent absence was unbeknownst to him beginning to take its toll.

  He stopped reading and stared at the book for a short time before closing it. Laying it down on the coffee table he got up from his chair. If someone was to quiz him on the first two chapters of his reading he wouldn’t be able to answer one single question correctly.

  David made the decision to go down the hall and knock on her door. A need for companionship was influencing his choices. Common sense was being outweighed by his yearning. He would tell her that he was too restless to sleep. Ask her if she wanted a nightcap and chat for a while longer. If she was receptive, he would invite her to his room or maybe she would invite him into hers. Either way he was going to get dressed and make his way down the hall.

  David knew it was an inappropriate move on his part. He wasn’t going to barge in and suggest they have sex. Even if that opportunity presented itself he wasn’t convinced he would act on it. Just sitting there, looking into one another’s eyes while continuing the conversations of the past hours was sufficient in itself. But he was determined he was going. Throwing on a pair of jeans and t-shirt he snatched his room keycard and made his way to her suite.

  The number on the door was Suite 10C. He studied it, making certain he actually was at the correct room. Knocking at the wrong one would surely be an embarrassing situation. But no, he was confident it was the correct one.

  He took a couple of deep breaths. This was so wrong in so many ways he was thinking. But yet he found himself raising his arm, clenching his fist in preparation of knocking. Just as he committed to making the movement of tapping he thought he heard a voice or voices from within the room. He pulled his fist away which was about a fraction of an inch from the door or a millisecond from announcing his presence.

  There he stood leaning his head towards the door but he could no longer hear any voices. Being in a nervous state he reasoned that maybe there had been no voices after all. His mind was clouded by a fixation. It had to be his imagination trumping reality, so his arm rose once again just as the voices or noises became more audible.

  This time he did hear something. It wasn’t talk. It was moaning. There were two voices. He was positive this was the suite he had reserved for her. After all they stood right here not more than a couple of hours ago. There was no doubt about it. The sound was of two people in the act of making love.

  David quickly returned to his room more confused than when he left, praying no one had noticed him. Could he have made a mistake with the room numbers? They had just spent the better part of the day together. There was never any indication that she was planning on meeting someone after they parted ways. He had no knowledge of Renée even knowing someone in Los Angeles. Something wasn’t adding up here. His emotions switched from desire to alarm, to concern for her safety all within minutes.

  Should he call her or go back down the hall and make up some lame excuse for knocking on her door. No, he couldn’t do either. She was a grown woman who owed him no explanation with regards to her personal life. It was best to clear his mind and put this whole incident to rest.

 
; He washed up, went to bed and turned the lights off. As he lied there it dawned on him, could Renée have been watching some risqué show on the television? Was that what he had heard? It had to be. It was the only thing that made sense. He convinced himself that was what he had heard. The more he thought about it, the more comfortable he was with the theory. And the more he thought about it the more allured by her he became. He wanted her.

  This is getting out of hand. You need to grow up. You’re a grown man. This is high school stuff. So get a grip on yourself man. This infatuation of yours is dangerous, was his train of thought before falling asleep.

  Chapter 8

  Early the next morning Serge sat across the desk from his oncologist.

  “Serge, there is no good way to say this. I wish there was,” the doctor began to break the bad news.

  “Doc, there is no need to sugarcoat it. I’ve lived a full life with no regrets. I’m prepared for whatever the diagnosis is.”

  “Okay, fair enough,” the doctor continued. “Your cancer cannot be treated. It’s terminal. All we can do at this point is to provide you medication to ease the pain.”

  “You know Doc, I knew. I’m not sure if it’s common that a person realizes the end is nearing before being officially told, but I did. How long do I have.”

  “Three months, maybe six.”

  The doctor thought to himself, this never gets easier then continued, “It will give you time to get your matters in order. I would be more than happy to meet with your family. I would also like to make an appointment for you and your family with one of our counselors here at the clinic. They will guide you and your love ones through this difficult time. They are very good at what they do.”

  “Thank you, doctor,” Serge replied than asked, “can I travel overseas?”

  “When would you consider making such a trip?”

  “You see, Doc, I came to America pursuing a dream to become one of the best horsemen in the world. I accomplished what I set out to do. But, in doing so, I’ve had to sacrifice my personal life. I never married, nor had children. What I do have is a brother and a sister among a number of other relatives I rarely see. I sometimes think I led a selfish life. But I had a dream,” he stopped for a minute.